Hobak

With only seven weeks left in Korea, I thought I'd want to stuff my face with as much kimchi as possible. And while I'm getting my daily fill of fermented cabbage, all I can think of is American food.

Well, let me clarify. I'm not sitting around daydreaming of Big Macs and french fries. I'm thinking about caesar salads. Enchiladas. Medjool dates. Goat cheese. Greek yogurt drizzled with honey. Hummus with warm pita. I could go on, but I'm writing this at a coffee shop, and I'm drooling. People are starting to stare.

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A broken ankle, snow on the ground, Facebook status updates on various Christmas activities. A year and four months in Korea, and I'm really missing home. Thankfully, I know just what to do (or eat) when the homesickness strikes: Budae Jjigae and Samgyetang.

school lunch

My foodie friend Megan Greenberg scoffed at the idea that I would gain weight on anything other than Gruyère and flan during my recovery. The thought of eating school lunches and Lara Bars while wearing sweatpants for a month and a half made her reevaluate our food-based friendship.

I understand where she's coming from. Hell, I'd much rather be eating large servings of Mexican custard and $15 grilled cheeses. But the fact is, I live in Korea. And Koreans don't do cheese.

Me!

Fully prepared to start checking off the items on my Korean Food Bucket List, I set off last Sunday with my friend Jason and a piece of paper. I had written down a few dishes I thought I could easily find in my neighborhood. But after walking around for 20 minutes, I realized why I hadn't checked them off sooner. I definitely need to do a bit more prep work.

Tea country

Every so often, the lights of the big city get too bright, the cars too loud and the people too rude. Lucky for me, there are a few groups of people (meetup.com) who are always looking to get away.

duck bbq

Back in the U.S., if someone were to suggest duck for dinner, I would decline; assuming they had an expensive craving for French fare. However, when a friend asked me to join them for BBQ duck in my neighborhood (Jangan-dong) tonight, I didn't think twice.

Korean food isn't fancy. It's not presented on pristine plates. It's not drizzled with colorful purées or rich sauces. Meat is served as meat, vegetables as vegetables. And the cost reflects the simplicity. In fact, I can't recall a meal in Seoul ever costing me more than 15,000 won (less than 13 American dollars). Tonight was no exception.

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Soft rock band Chicago once sang, “You bring meaning to my life, you’re my inspiration…” Sure, they were probably talking about some busty brunette; but hey, everyone’s different. The love of my life just so happens to be a pig.

I had been fantasizing about this particular pig since my co-teacher found out I was going to Jeju Island—the Hawaii of Korea—for my summer break. In true Korean fashion, she had stopped by the tourist office and picked up pamphlets, maps, and books to help me enjoy my stay.

"Can I buy ye a green beer, or perhaps dance a jig with you on the dance floor, lovely lady?" asked a man dressed from head to toe in green.

"No thanks," I politely responded.

"Oh, come on, darlin'," the man continued in hist best Irish accent.

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Every weekend, my roommates and I try to do something “touristy.” And every weekend, we end up getting lost.

Not this time.

The moment we exited Noryangjin subway station, the smell of fish and saltwater guided us over a bridge and down two flights of stairs—into the largest seafood market in Seoul.

“You are very beautiful, Jennifer teacher, but you are a little fat.”

I wanted to end class then and there. I wanted to run home, bury my face in my pillow and cry. But the tears wouldn’t wait. I dropped my scissors, put down the construction paper turkey and sobbed.

I suddenly missed America—the land where a size six was normal—a place where every retail store sold clothes and shoes to fit my body. But alas, I live in Korea, where normal is a size 0 and a 6 is, well, apparently fat.